New Life Resolutions - 2014 and Beyond

In December 2012, I conducted a thorough examination and inventory of what and whom I had allowed to take my mind, time, energy, and spirit.  My blood pressure was sky high, I was in the middle of livelihood transitions, and other personal matters weighed upon immediate and needed decisions and actions.  From that inventory, I developed my New Life Resolutions and on this last day in December of 2013, I can declare that those resolutions remained intact the entire year.

What I discovered is that although New Life Resolutions and New Year Resolutions commence the same way, the approach is rather different.

With New Year Resolutions, the goals are stamped with an expiration date - 12/31 of that year.  New Year Resolutions are somewhat superficial - not just in appearance, but in lack of depth with little regard for next step.  New Year Resolutions are great for planning goals.  New Year Resolutions can be easily abandoned.

What I found with New Life Resolutions is that they have meat - substance.  There are no expiration dates or short term visionary planning.  The depth encompasses more than losing weight, changing careers, or making more money.  The core of New Life Resolutions is the awakening to what really counts beyond status quo with intense focus on the very one who is creating the New Life Resolution...beyond the tradition and definitely with no regard to any surrounding opinions.

A person can be no good to anyone else unless they are the absolute best to themselves 

- thus the foundation of a New Life Resolution.

The archive of the following broadcast is no longer available.  Be sure to follow Lady Intelligence Live at:  http://www.blogtalkradio.com/ladyintelligencelive.rss.


Tune in to Lady Intelligence Live on Saturday, January 4 at 11:00 AM EST as we discuss crafting your own New Life Resolutions that will withstand the challenges of maintenance and will grow as you evolve.

In preparation for this broadcast, prepare a list of the areas in your life that you would like to see vastly improved.  Have pen and paper in hand.

The listen in line is 718.766.4403.

Saying Until We Meet Again in Creative Terms

During the discussion of a recent Lady Intelligence Live! broadcast about money, the cost of funerals came up.

My guest and I shared about how we personally knew how costly it is to have a traditional funeral and the best way to combat those costs would be via a substantial life insurance policy, pre-planning/pre-payment, cremation, and/or having a non-traditional way of having a homegoing celebration for the departed beloved.  My guest and I continued to share that a great many number of funerals are planned with the thought of impressing the living or out of guilt of what was not done when their loved one was alive.

I noted during this broadcast that every time the casket is moved, it costs money i.e. from the funeral home to the church they've attended for 50 years to the cemetery.  I also shared that a friend shared a creative idea with me once...having a catered dinner with friends and family forgoing the funeral and church and its usual pomp and circumstances.

When my grandmother was living, she would oftentimes mention after a funeral that "that is just too much money to go into the ground."  We took that into consideration when the sad yet appointed season came to planning her homegoing.  Since my immediate family has been historically proactive in taking care of money matters, funeral expenses were already pre-paid for my grandmother.  Her sentiments were respected because when caskets, burial plots, and services are pre-paid, the costs are already locked in for that era's pricing.  My father had a top of the line quality full-couch casket that aren't common anymore - at least over 15 years ago, but the cost was thousands of dollars less than if the casket of today would have been purchased.  Had cash been paid for his funeral last year, the total costs would have been $13,000 plus.  Instead, the costs were SIGNIFICANTLY less and the painful sting in planning was lessened.

But getting back to the creative of celebrating the life of a beloved, I went about my day after the broadcast...in the kitchen actually... :)...and various ideas came to imagination:

• Catered dinner in an upscale venue to only friends, co-workers, and family that were pleasantly close and actively involved in the departed's life when they were living - hopefully the beloved was vocal to loved ones as to who they deemed close or special in their lives - past and present
• Private interment services with only immediate family
• Formal yet lively detailed program either during the catered dinner or in another venue could include: departed's favorite music played and favorite foods/refreshments served, reflections shared from intimate friends and family members, slide presentation from infant to latest memories, display of the departed's gifts/works/achievements in audio or visual, etc.

The departure of the spirit from the body temple is in inevitable period of time and remains a financial transaction that is just as important as buying a home, purchasing a vehicle, and paying for further education.  Having this discussion and having wishes revealed and in place is the ultimate demonstration of love to all beloveds and ushers a sense of peace into a season.

"Big Girl, Little Girl" - To Be Re-Released Summer 2014

Update:  As of Friday, March 28, 2014 - 2:30 PM EST

In recent weeks, I have received a great number of requests for the book "Big Girl Little Girl", a title that I retired a few months ago.

Lady Intelligence will be re-releasing this content in 2015.

Thank you so much for your interest in Lady Intelligence and looking forward to continuing the dialogue about matters that matter.


~~~~~

The Following Was Originally Published - 8/24/2013 - 12:59 PM EST on Lady Intelligence - The Blog.

When I wrote "Big Girl Little Girl", I was in a season of extreme anger, guilt, fear, and worry.

There was much to deal with at the time, medical care treatments for myself and other family members (yes, plural), job losses (yep, plural again), and constant financial restructure.

The anger was there mostly because there were many missteps that I took where I wish I had either been taught better or at least recognized better approaches before the missteps were made.  Since I have two daughters, I became extremely fearful that they would follow in my footsteps while missing out or totally ignoring wonderful and stable (as stable as can be in life) opportunities.

I went on this fast and furious trip to write the book to give to my daughters and also to share with all females to spare them from unnecessary heartache and headache.

In that fast and furious trip, I wrote with the anger and candor that was in my mind.  At the time, most profane words were in my everyday dialogue and I wrote exactly how I spoke.

I didn't realize it until just now while composing this post, but "Big Girl Little Girl" was published on August 24 in 2012.  Exactly one year ago from the date of this announcement.

A lot has changed in just one year.

I stopped cussing, I'm no longer angry, and I no longer operate under the influence of fear, commercialism, worry, or desperation - just to name a few.

Although, the content of the book is priceless, the language in which the content is presented has actually become disturbing for me as the author.  Like it was written by a stranger.

Since the publication of "Big Girl Little Girl", I have begun the manuscripts for three other books.  Publication for these books are envisioned for late 2013/early 2014.  One of the books is a comprehensive informational book geared toward the business industry.  Another is a story about four women who have never met but whose lives are intertwined due to decisions that they have made.  The third one - is a surprise!

"Big Girl Little Girl" may be rewritten eventually.  The rewrite will definitely contain updated information and the introduction of new pertinent information due to multiple consumer trend changes - but this time coming from a perspective of hope, faith, and encouragement.

This was a very difficult decision to make because it was like giving up a baby. However, it is a decision that I am now ecstatic that I have made. It's funny, but I am also grateful that "Big Girl Little Girl" did not achieve mass sales in which I had originally hoped.   But what I have personally achieved is exponential invaluable growth as an individual in various aspects and the language in "Big Girl Little Girl" could have possibly caused a branding that would be in conflict of the messages in future publications.

This is indeed a lesson of being thankful that things did not go through as originally desired. 

For all who have a copy of "Big Girl Little Girl," it is now a collector's item - still covered under copyright law though.  :)

I look forward and now I feel liberated to publishing the other manuscripts under the Lady Intelligence, Ltd. imprint which will be introduced in e-book format to make it easier for all to obtain a copy quickly and at a lower cost in addition to the option of purchasing a paperback copy.

My mission has always been to take what I've learned, gone through, and observed from other case studies to share whatever is needed to help another female obtain a better outcome when it comes to men, money, medicine, health, wealth, and wellness.  Life enrichment information comes from not just success stories but also from difficult learning lessons encountered by others.

Stay tuned to Lady Intelligence Live! as excerpts from "Big Girl Little Girl" are oftentimes shared as well as on Lady Intelligence - The Blog. 

Join the Lady Intelligence Connection to receive announcements about the upcoming book releases!!

Thank you...

...and I'm excited

Nicol T
Author and Lady Intelligence Live! Internet Radio Talk Show Host

Originally Published - 8/24/2013 - 12:59 PM EST on Lady Intelligence - The Blog.

Your MLM Business May Not Be Your Business (Technically)

Multi-Level Marketing Business opportunities are in great supply.  The legitimate MLM businesses, the ones that follow some kind of governmental regulation, offer lucrative income possibilities.

Ah, possibilities - key word.

There are thousands of people who have become wealthy in building an MLM network.  MLMs are not typically pyramid schemes.  The only pyramid schemes are jobs where there is a boss who makes more and the subordinates usually always make less.  In MLM, someone in the downline of an organization can actually make much more than someone in the upline.  How?

Effort.  Extreme effort.  It's not an easy thing to do and it takes persistence, consistence, and perserverance.  Vision boards, weekly meetings/seminars/motivational events, non-stop communication, and little time for entertainment are all what helps to build a powerful network marketing organization.

The MLM business is classified as the networker's own business because the networker becomes the independent contractor and some of their business expenses are tax deductible.

The only problem about heavily regulated MLMs is that social media is a no-no for advertising.  In today's world where few people talk on the phone and opt to texting, e-mailing, tweeting, posting updates on their social media account, streaming music, and obtaining news from their smartphones, conducting telephone invitations and passing around flyers to events make for a day in and day out great amount of effort.  In some MLMs, it may be challenging to advertise where people's eyes are looking.

MLMs that don't allow for social media or digital advertising bring it home that the business is not really the independent contractors.  If e-mail messages and other types of electronic communication are prohibited, then that MLM is in reality a job with a couple extra tax benefits.

People who call the shots as to advertising, communication, and other day-to-day operations including branding are those who are true business owners and not pawns (may be a harsh word but reality can be a harsh word too) to make the creator of the MLM organization richer.

Consider how much energy to expend when building an MLM organization versus using that energy to develop own network with business plan, operations, and a system of personnel, products, and services.

But above all - the most important thing to consider is if there is a back-up plan for the MLM business.  The MLM business is corporately owned and operated by those never met unless it was at the national convention and the network marketer was there and shook their hand personally.

If an MLM corporation shuts down abruptly and all household income was based on that MLM, that can be immediate financial ruin for some.

Now is that MLM business really having your own business?

Are You Ready For A Serious Relationship?

Listen to the archive on

Lady Intelligence Live!

Finding the Love of Your Life

Listen to internet radio with Lady Intelligence Live on BlogTalkRadio

A True Friend - A Lesson As Early As Possible

Source:  ywca.org

Health Relationship Green Flags ~ Unhealthy Relationship Red Flags

 

Source:  ywca.org

The Younger To Learn, The Better

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships

Adolescents in healthy relationships respect each other. They can talk honestly and freely to each other and share power and control over decisions. They trust and support each other and respect each other’s independence. In contrast, an unhealthy relationship is unbalanced. One partner tries to control the other. The characteristics in the “unhealthy relationships” column should be seen as “red flags” or early warning signs for abuse.

Healthy Relationships	Unhealthy Relationships
Equality - Partners share decisions and responsibilities.  They discuss roles to make sure they're fair and equal.	Control - One partner makes all the decisions and tells the other what to do, or tells the other person what to wear or who to spend time with.
Honesty - Partners share their dreams, fears and concerns with each other.  They tell each other how they feel and share important information.	Dishonesty - One partner lies to or keeps information from the other.  One partner steals from the other.
Physical safety - Partners feel physically safe in the relationship and respect each other's space.	Physical abuse - One partner uses force to get his/her way (for example, hitting, slapping, grabbing, shoving).
Respect - Partners treat each other like they want to be treated and accept each other's opinions, friends, and interests.  They listen to each other.	Disrespect - One partner makes fun of the opinions and interests of the other partner.  He or she may destroy something that belongs to the other partner.
Comfort - Partners feel safe with each other and respect each other's differences.  They realize when they're wrong and are not afraid to say, "I'm sorry." Partners can "be themselves" with each other.	Intimidation - One partner tries to control every aspect of the other's life. One partner may attempt to keep his or her partner from friends and family or threaten violence or a break-up.
Sexual respectfulness - Partners never force sexual activity or insist on doing something the other isn't comfortable with.	Sexual abuse - One partner pressures or forces the other into sexual activity against his/her will or without his/her consent.
Independence - Neither partner is dependent upon the other for an identity. Partners maintain friendships outside of the relationship. Either partner has the right to end the relationship.	Dependence - One partner feels that he/she "can't live without" the other. He/she may threaten to do something drastic if the relationship ends.
Humor - The relationship is enjoyable for both partners. Partners laugh and have fun.	Hostility - One partner may "walk on egg shells" to avoid upsetting the other. Teasing is mean-spirited.

The information in the above table has been adapted from the Liz Claiborne-sponsored web site http://www.loveisnotabuse.com, Youth Resource http://www.youthresource.com/our_lives/healthy_relationships, and the Center for Young Women’s Health at http://www.youngwomenshealth.org/healthy_relat.html.

Source:

http://www.hhs.gov/opa/familylife/tech_assistance/etraining/partner/healthy/index.html

Practicing What I Preach

June 27 was National HIV Testing Day and on that day and any other day that's about HIV/AIDS awareness, I preach about the need to get tested.  I preach about the need for potential lovers to get tested together so that they begin on the same page.  As part of the Get To Know Him Better Awareness Campaign, I preach that HIV testing is a major component in getting to know about someone with whom you are entertaining cultivating an intimate relationship.

Well, today I attended a Pride Festival.  If you don't know what a Pride Festival is, it's an event that celebrates the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) culture.  Although I am a woman that is strictly d**kly, I respect the viewpoints and lifestyles of others (judge not, lest ye be judged).   With a forecast of scattered thunderstorms throughout the whole day, not one drop of rain fell on the festival grounds. It couldn't have been a more beautiful summer day for music, dancing, conversation, fellowship, contests and giveaways at every booth, and education.

And you know what?  I saw maybe four police officers the entire six hours I was there.  If heterosexuals could get together for an event with peace, love, and acceptance in their heart, it would truly be a beautiful world.  I'm just saying.

Well, as soon as I entered the area, there was the city public health RV giving out free gift cards for taking a free HIV test.

Whoa!!! Just like I preach on Lady Intelligence Live, it's easy to get an HIV test - at the free clinic, at community events, at home, and/or through the city public health department.

However, getting an HIV test is a daunting task even if one is doubtful that they are infected.  But there's nothing like knowing for sure.

So, after getting the blood test and then later an oral test, I am thankful that both tests were negative.

I can continue to preach.  I've had the practice.


~~~

Got a Blood Pressure check too.  Keeping it real with Simple Health and Wellness.

Three Keys to Financial Happiness (Suze Orman)

This is a great clip from Suze Orman.

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-3445_162-57575956/suze-orman-3-keys-to-your-financial-happiness/

National HIV Testing Day - June 27

The National HIV Testing Day may be over as this post is composed and published, but June 28 and thereafter is as good as any day to obtain an HIV Test.

As I mention on a continual basis on Lady Intelligence Live; in my book Big Girl Little Girl; on this platform, Lady Intelligence - The Blog; and as a part of the Get To Know Him Better Awareness Campaign; potential sexual partners should get tested together AND get the results together.   That way both are on the same page.  Although, it won't guarantee monogamy or the absence of future exposure, at least it's a step in knowing at that moment if that potential lover can affect someone with HIV - mainly YOU.

No longer does a person have to go to their doctor, a free clinic, or their local health department to get tested.  A couple can take the test in privacy with an HIV Home Test (info from FDA.Gov).

There's no specific date to get tested.  There are 365 days a year to do so.

More Info:

BlackDoctor.org Article Post - 
A Couple Who Tests Together, Stays Together:  2 Doctors Break Down Love & HIV

I Would Be Remiss Without Adding to the Simple Health and Wellness Broadcast Episode...

...that although I said during the broadcast that the nurse practitioner and the gynecologist saved my life, in all truth it was God that led me to a conscientious nurse practitioner I had never met (my gynecologist of 20 years was on leave at the time) to the sequence of medical examinations and treatments to uncover a usually silent condition that doesn't make a peep until it has progressed to a threatening and serious prognosis.

I must also add that the symptoms that led me to make an appointment were not on the classic symptom list.  I didn't feel right.  I felt something out of place.  It wasn't painful.  I actually thought it was the birth control device and that it possibly moved out of place.

Looking back to that season, I didn't speak much about the condition but only to a few people, i.e. three sisters in Christ at church; a cousin; a colleague/neighbor/friend who was my rock in helping me with transportation and household matters; a childhood friend who took care of my home while I was in the hospital; and my children so they would be up-to-date with their family medical history and not kept in the dark with what was going on with their mother.

In my telling, I shared only what was needed to be known. I meticulously kept any inkling of the treatment process from those I knew or felt would make it an interrogation opportunity.  I vowed not to give life and presence to the doctor's diagnosis so that my energy, mind and soul would be consistently focused on nothing but having good health.

Every time the specialist asked me if there was anyone to whom he needed to speak, I told him no.

I went to each appointment by myself.  But I was never alone.  God was there the whole time.


Lady Intelligence Live Broadcast:  Simple Health and Wellness

Powerful Couples, Parenting, and Get To Know Him Better*

-->

Forbes Came Out With Their World’s Most Powerful Couples List

The list includes:

• Barack and Michelle Obama
• Melinda Gates and Bill Gates
• Jay-Z and Beyonce
• Xi Jinping and Peng Liyuan of China
• Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt
• Portia de Rossi and Ellen DeGeneres
• Marissa Mayer and Zachary Bogue
• Hillary and Bill Clinton
• Gerard Pique and Shakir
• Patrizio Bertelli and Miuccia Prada
• Cher Wang and Wenchi Chen
• Mike Nichols and Diane Sawyer
• Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen
• Barry Diller and Diane von Furstenberg
• Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh

There is nothing really special about these couples as far as them being different from anyone else.  They all came from their momma’s womb, they came up as kids with a few of them from humble beginnings, and most of them didn’t have diamond spoons in their mouths.   

I don’t believe all of them are even college graduates.

What is common with all of these couples is that they are all visionaries – individually and together.  When they got together they sat down and got to know each other below the skin and out of the bedroom.  They talked about each stage of their life and where they wanted to go: 

• from their career 
• to how they wanted to raise their kids
• to where they will live
• to how they would make an impact 
• to how they will retire

They talked about how they would invest and manage their money.   

They stuck to the plan with respect, loyalty, dedication and love.  

They also aligned their lives on course together in a concentrated area.  These powerful couples are partners in a particular industry or closely tied industries.   

There is strength in numbers and there is strength in unity.  The recipe to being a powerful couple is quite simple.  

Parenting

Another powerful couple is Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith.  Recently, Will Smith did an interview giving his take on parenting with Haute Living.

The key note that Will Smith said about parenting is that parents should not view kids as "slaves or property."   That's a tip to parenting that most parents learn too late....when their children are grown.

Although it's not the first time it's been shared, Will Smith also talked about how he and Jada sat down and talked about how they would parent their children.  Something that many parents do not do but it so important. 

Kids are not little clay models to mold into what parents want them to be or do in life.  Children are simply developing human beings that need just three things:  

1. Love
2. Provision
3. Preparation

Get to Know Him Better

Since May 6, 2013, we have learned how three women were held captive for over ten years -  one of them 11 years while during that time a child was born into captivity.   

Those three women weren’t living in a shed out in the country.  They weren’t down in an abandoned well in a field.   

Those women were held in a house in a neighborhood that was frequented by family and neighbors.  Hindsight now have family and neighbors remembering the peculiarities.  The locked doors.  Not allowed in certain places.  This is a classic example of how a person can be known but not be known about.

Have you ever seen in a movie how a person saw something peculiar and shared it with someone else and it was blown off?  But it kept bothering that person until they looked into it themselves.

I remember the Jeffrey Dahmer case when the police came to the door and gave that little boy back to Dahmer with a laugh.  In the recent case with the three women, the neighbors across the street saw a naked woman in the backyard.  When the girls told their mother later, she thought too much time had lapsed and didn’t call the police.  When the man they dubbed the Cleveland Strangler killed 11 women, there were signs all over the place.  Foul smell in the neighborhood, a naked woman seen in the yard, etc.

When a woman meets somebody, she needs to do what Michelle, Melinda, Beyonce, and Jada did.   

Get To Know Him.   

She also needs to do what others don’t do.  Look for the peculiarities.  Does he act funny about his home, or anything that he does?  If a man is acting mysterious at a time that you are contemplating a relationship with him, then it’s time to put on the brakes.   

There is no room for mystery from a man.   

A woman should have some mystery about herself until she gets to know him.. for one, to keep the intrigue going for the man because men and women don’t fall in love the same way and secondly, in case the man finally drops the facade (if he was holding one up) and turns out to be a person that the woman needs to get away from in a jiffy.

N 

*From the May 25, 2013 episode of Lady Intelligence Live!

More on the Will Smith interview:

http://blackamericaweb.com/129230/will-smiths-key-to-parenting-not-looking-at-kids-as-slaves-or-property/

Hooray for Mary!! She Got Off Welfare!!*

Mary, divorced mother of two, lost her job.  She applied for unemployment benefits and got her first check three and a half weeks after her last week of work.

Unemployment compensation barely covered housing however Mary was $110 below the maximum limit to receive medical benefits and $70 a month below the maximum limit to get food stamps.  Mary was then eligible for vouchers at the daycare where her children attends as well.  When Mary was working, she paid $710 a month for daycare.  While on unemployment, she just had to pay $25 a month.  Mary also qualified for utility service assistance.

After six months of submitting as many as 50 applications a week,  attending the mandatory work programs, and providing information to unemployment about how many times she contacted a company for a job week after week, Mary obtained a job making $700 more a month gross than what she was getting in unemployment and $2,000 a month gross less than what she used to make at the job where she was laid off.

Mary is no longer eligible for food stamps, day care, utility service assistance, and medical insurance coverage because now she makes over the income eligibility requirement to receive those services.

Mary is barely making the rent payment on time and goes to food pantries and churches for food while she and her children walk around with no medical coverage.  Mary's elderly mother keeps her two children while she goes to work.  Mary is looking for a less expensive place to live.  She has found that she can afford an apartment in an area with little police presence and high crime statistics.

Mary must be congratulated and hailed for the progress she has made in her life.


*Based on a true story of many.

...Makes A Lot of Sense

To get rid of prostitution...
...by setting up sting operations to bust Johns.

To get rid of drugs...
...by catching the users and putting them in jail for long term sentences.

To get guns off the street...
...by making it harder for the people who legitimately get guns

To prepare upcoming generations to be productive as adults in 2026 ...
...by continuing to teach them what was taught in 1974

 To prepare upcoming generations to be productive as adults in 2026 ...
 ...by continuing to teach them to pass a test vs. on what they will apply in life as wise consumers and relationship developers

Money Matters: Grow a Snowball Year Round

Pay Off Debt and Become Debt Free with the 

Snowball Debt Repayment Method

1. Spread all of the bill statements out so that the interest rate, if applicable, and the balance due can be seen.
2. Sort the bills from lowest to highest dollar amount.
3. Then sort those bills by interest – higher to lower.  For example if you have two bills for $300 and one of them has interest for 4% and the other for 5%, put the 5% first.  That bill is costing more money in the long run and needs to get eliminated as soon as possible.
4. Next, make a list of these bills in the order that you have placed them in hand.
5. Next to each bill write down the total due, the minimum payment amount, and the finance or interest rate.
6. Pay all of the bills the minimum payment amount.  If there is anything extra that can be paid toward the debt elimination, put it all on the first bill on the list.  When the first bill is paid off, that’s a WIN.  Celebrate….for a moment.
7. Next month, apply all of the payment amount that when on the first bill each month with the minimum payment that goes to the second bill.  So if $60 was going to the first bill and $50 was going to the second bill, the payment for the second bill every month until pay off is, $110. 
8. When the second bill is paid off – Celebrate…for the moment.
9. Continuing on with the example, the next month take the $110 and apply it with the third bill.  If that third bill was $60, now the monthly payment amount for that bill until pay of is: $170.
10. As the bills are marked off down the list as paid off, the bills are getting paid off faster and faster because more money is being applied to the next bill cutting the length of time to repayment than if the bill was being paid with the minimum payment amount.
11. The snowball debt repayment plan can take anywhere from one year to five years depending on the total amount of debt and how much money is going toward paying off that debt.

Once the debts are paid off, the money that was going to debts can now go toward creating your passive income.



---

www.ladyintelligence.com

May 1st is the 12th Annual National Day to Prevent Teen Pregnancy

Wednesday, May 1, 2013 is the 12^th Annual National Day to Prevent Teen Pregnancy and it’s sponsored by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and UnplannedPregnancy.   

This year’s theme is:  "Sex Has Consequences".  

On that day and through the month, teens nationwide can visit StayTeen.org to participate in the online quiz – which challenges teens to think carefully about what they might do in the moment through a series of interactive scenarios.* 

Lady Intelligence believes that part of "Get To Know Him Better" Awareness Campaign is knowing one's self and the consequences involved.  Women who intentionally or unintentionally make bad choices in relationships come from a younger generation that intentionally or unintentionally made bad choices when it came to their interactions with the opposite sex and future planning.  

Awareness is power.  Early Awareness is Powerful.

 More Information:

*http://www.thenationalcampaign.org/
*http://www.stayteen.org/
*http://www.thenationalcampaign.org/national/

Good Debt Vs. Bad Debt

I had to chuckle.  I wanted to find a nice little online tool to reference to readers without making a lesson plan out of a blog post.  So, in my first search over the Internet, all these articles came up about presidents' net worth, celebrities' net worth, the top whatever number rich folk lists, etc.  Would be interesting to know the number of people who read those articles that knew their own net worth.

Anyway, some things people should just know...where they came from and where are they going; their social security number by heart; the date, time and location of their birth; compatibility; the date they want to retire coinciding with the date that they should be able to retire; where all the important papers are such as insurance policies, all the different kind of wills, and any power of attorney docs; the dollars and cents and/or value in each bank account and/or investments; and lastly, their net worth, cashflow and credit score.

Don't know too many people who want to be broke, but know a lot of people who would like to be financially free.  To be financially free is to have a cashflow where there the passive income dollar amount is more than the expenses dollar amount.  Passive income is income that comes in without going out and punching in at a job to get it.  Passive income would be income from real estate, investments, businesses, etc.  Financially free is not going out to the job every day.

Having a good credit score helps to make the financial terms favorable such as getting a low to zero interest rate and other incentives.  There are ways to obtain financing for homes and cars without using a credit score, but it requires a significant down payment, an excellent employment and personal history, and other special demonstrations and documentation.

My personal definition of credit is:  
"Credit is simply someone getting something that they can't afford to pay in full upfront on a payment plan and then paying extra money on top of the payment plan to use the payment plan." 

The majority of consumers use credit because it's "easier" to use to get stuff.  The only thing is that if credit is used to purchase something, having an excellent credit rating is key so it would be as close as possible to making layaway payments but with the merchandise already in hand.

I. Here are the formulas:

1. Assets - Liabilities = Net Worth
2. Income - Expenses = Cash Flow
3. FICO Score = Credit Score (important to know*)

II. Tools randomly found on the Internet**:

CNN Money Net Worth Calculator:  http://cgi.money.cnn.com/tools/networth/networth.html

PremierWest Bank - Financial Answer Center

• Calculating Cashflow: http://answers.premierwestbank.com/page.php?b=24532459-0&c=1451
• Calculating Net Worth: http://answers.premierwestbank.com/page.php?b=24532459-0&c=1449
• Personal Cashflow Spreadsheet:  http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/templates/results.aspx?qu=personal+cashflow&ex=1&origin=TC103107637#ai:TC103107654|

Free Annual Credit Report:  https://www.annualcreditreport.com/cra/index.jsp



III. Great Learning Tool***:

Rich Dad Poor Dad Cashflow 101 Game:  Online Version and Board Game
http://www.richdad.com/Rich-Dad-Games/CASHFLOW.aspx




*Learn more about FICO and Credit Scores at:  http://www.myfico.com/crediteducation/whatsinyourscore.aspx.
Remember, there is no need to pay to obtain a credit report from all credit reporting bureaus.  Everyone is entitled to a free annual credit report from all credit reporting bureaus from https://www.annualcreditreport.com/cra/index.jsp. 
Be careful of multiple inquiries.  Multiple inquiries affect the credit score except the inquiry for the person requesting a copy of their own credit report.
In addition to public records and creditor reporting, credit reporting bureaus get their data from applications. What a consumer puts on an application and tells the lender goes on the credit report file for all to see - including current creditors and those who hold judgments against that particular consumer.
Be sure that the free credit report program reviews offered by banks are not using the free annual credit report opportunity that is available directly for consumers.

**Not an endorsement or recommendation.  Just a reference.

***I personally have the game and it's more than just having fun.  Great for any age.

Net Worth, Cash Flow, and Credit Score

I had to chuckle.  I wanted to find a nice little online tool to reference to readers without making a lesson plan out of a blog post.  So, in my first search over the Internet, all these articles came up about presidents' net worth, celebrities' net worth, the top whatever number rich folk lists, etc.  Would be interesting to know the number of people who read those articles that knew their own net worth.

Anyway, some things people should just know...where they came from and where are they going; their social security number by heart; the date, time and location of their birth; compatibility; the date they want to retire coinciding with the date that they should be able to retire; where all the important papers are such as insurance policies, all the different kind of wills, and any power of attorney docs; the dollars and cents and/or value in each bank account and/or investments; and lastly, their net worth, cashflow and credit score.

Don't know too many people who want to be broke, but know a lot of people who would like to be financially free.  To be financially free is to have a cashflow where there the passive income dollar amount is more than the expenses dollar amount.  Passive income is income that comes in without going out and punching in at a job to get it.  Passive income would be income from real estate, investments, businesses, etc.  Financially free is not going out to the job every day.

Having a good credit score helps to make the financial terms favorable such as getting a low to zero interest rate and other incentives.  There are ways to obtain financing for homes and cars without using a credit score, but it requires a significant down payment, an excellent employment and personal history, and other special demonstrations and documentation.

My personal definition of credit is:  
"Credit is simply someone getting something that they can't afford to pay in full upfront on a payment plan and then paying extra money on top of the payment plan to use the payment plan." 

The majority of consumers use credit because it's "easier" to use to get stuff.  The only thing is that if credit is used to purchase something, having an excellent credit rating is key so it would be as close as possible to making layaway payments but with the merchandise already in hand.

I. Here are the formulas:

1. Assets - Liabilities = Net Worth
2. Income - Expenses = Cash Flow
3. FICO Score = Credit Score (important to know*)

II. Tools randomly found on the Internet**:

CNN Money Net Worth Calculator:  http://cgi.money.cnn.com/tools/networth/networth.html

PremierWest Bank - Financial Answer Center

• Calculating Cashflow: http://answers.premierwestbank.com/page.php?b=24532459-0&c=1451
• Calculating Net Worth: http://answers.premierwestbank.com/page.php?b=24532459-0&c=1449
• Personal Cashflow Spreadsheet:  http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/templates/results.aspx?qu=personal+cashflow&ex=1&origin=TC103107637#ai:TC103107654|

Free Annual Credit Report:  https://www.annualcreditreport.com/cra/index.jsp



III. Great Learning Tool***:

Rich Dad Poor Dad Cashflow 101 Game:  Online Version and Board Game
http://www.richdad.com/Rich-Dad-Games/CASHFLOW.aspx




*Learn more about FICO and Credit Scores at:  http://www.myfico.com/crediteducation/whatsinyourscore.aspx.
Remember, there is no need to pay to obtain a credit report from all credit reporting bureaus.  Everyone is entitled to a free annual credit report from all credit reporting bureaus from https://www.annualcreditreport.com/cra/index.jsp. 
Be careful of multiple inquiries.  Multiple inquiries affect the credit score except the inquiry for the person requesting a copy of their own credit report.
In addition to public records and creditor reporting, credit reporting bureaus get their data from applications. What a consumer puts on an application and tells the lender goes on the credit report file for all to see - including current creditors and those who hold judgments against that particular consumer.
Be sure that the free credit report program reviews offered by banks are not using the free annual credit report opportunity that is available directly for consumers.

**Not an endorsement or recommendation.  Just a reference.

***I personally have the game and it's more than just having fun.  Great for any age.

Stress

Just the word itself can make a person cringe.

A dictionary definition:  a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances.

Stress is unhealthy.  Stress can quickly turn to anxiety and/or depression.  Stress zaps precious moments away from life itself.  Stress clouds judgement and makes a minor detail turn into a major disaster.

Ways to eliminate stress:

1. Develop a daily meditative practice.  
In some cultures, meditation or prayer is done many times a day. Take two deep breaths.   Concentrate only on the breath going in and going out.  When thoughts start to wander, go back to concentrating on the breath.  Add yoga as a meditative practice in addition to still meditation.

2. Exercise. 
A brisk walk around the neighborhood for about 20 or 30 minutes does wonders. Don't listen to music, don't talk on the phone or text (for one, to maintain awareness of surroundings of four-legged and two-legged creatures depending on the area), and don't use the time to worry about anything that worrying is not going to change - which would be anything.  Use the time to enjoy the fresh air and the nature surround sounds.  Bicycle riding, skating, going to the gym, all the same.  The key is exercise.

3. Develop a daily gratitude check.
Think about only the good things in life.  If breathing, check that off as number one.  If walking, check that off as number two.  If walking around unsupervised and unchained, check that off as number three.  If wearing clothes and shoes, make that number four.  If food was eaten and water was available, make that number five.  And so on.  Eventually, the grateful list will grow beyond the electricity still on and a bill being paid to the little things like having a matching hat and scarf set to as big as just missing a hold-up at the favorite gas station.  Instead of concentrating on what's wrong or could go wrong, the mindset is changed to focus on what's good - with easy continual practice.  More good comes when the focus is on the good.  It's all about the window where a person sees the world.  If the window is dirty, then the world doesn't look pretty.  Make a gratitude check as frequent as inhaling.

4. Squash the Stressing
Look at whatever is causing the stress as an opportunity for growth and a stepping stone to bigger and better things.  Stressors can make or break.  Come out unbroken.

5. Be In The Moment
There is nothing that can be done about yesterday and tomorrow will operate in the way that it wants without permission, manipulation or authority from any person.  Stay in the moment.  The biggest stressors in life are grieving about what happened and trying to do something to make an outcome happen a certain way in the future or a different way in the past.


Interesting Reading*:

Indiana University: What Stress Does to the Body
http://www.indiana.edu/~engs/hints/stress1.htm


Centers for Disease Control and Prevention:  Managing Stress
http://www.cdc.gov/Features/handlingstress/index.html


New York Times - Health Guide: Stress and Anxiety
http://health.nytimes.com/health/guides/symptoms/stress-and-anxiety/overview.html


Web MD - Health and Balance:  Blissing Out:  10 Relaxation Techniques to Reduce Stress On-the-Spot
http://www.webmd.com/balance/guide/blissing-out-10-relaxation-techniques-reduce-stress-spot


*Above links are not recommended as professional substitutes.  Just provided as sources for other ideas to deal with stress and anxiety.  If need be, seek financial, medical, legal, relationship related, family matter related or psychological advice from someone certified or licensed in that particular profession.

The Beginning of the Series...on Lady Intelligence Live

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When Buying a Car, Avoid Creating Negative Equity

Negative Equity is when the loan balance is more than what something is worth.

Negative equity in a car happens when:

1.  A vehicle is financed with a high interest rate. The current auto loan rate for someone with excellent credit is anywhere from 0% to no higher than 4% with the average rate 2.78%.  

Anytime a car loan is upwards to 9%, 15%, and 25% is because of one or more of the following:

• the applicant was not  a “well-qualified” buyer
• the applicant didn’t read the paperwork before signing and just went with what the car salesperson and finance manager told them
• the applicant didn’t know the current auto loan rate
• the applicant was just glad that they were given the opportunity to buy a car and only paid attention to what the monthly payment would be and not the total cost when it’s all over including interest, taxes, and fees

2.  Trading in a car with a high balance to buy another car.  If a new car is desired every two or three years, it’s better to lease.  When a car with an auto loan is traded in, the balance owed on the old car goes on to the new car loan, which will make the car loan higher than what the new car is worth.

3.  The car was purchased for an amount higher than the value of the vehicle.  Know the value of a vehicle.  Purchase the vehicle at a price amount to compensate for depreciation.

Tips To Do Before Buying a Vehicle:

• Know the current auto loan rates on cars.
• Gather info about the value of a car from various sources especially if purchasing a used vehicle.
• Go to different dealerships to get quotes on the cars in which you are interested.
• Get the history on the vehicle BEFORE signing.

Additional info:

• Wanna Buy A Brand New Car?
• Bankrate.com – Negative Equity Auto Loan Payment Calculator
• Bankrate.com – Auto Rates
• Kelly Blue Book
• CarFax

Top 10 Lessons Not to Learn the Hard Way About Sexual Health

The Top 10 Lessons Not to Learn the Hard Way About Sexual Health are:

1. STDs are sexually transmitted diseases.
2. STDs may be treatable ( i.e. herpes) but all STDs are not curable (HIV/AIDS).
3. STDs can go undetected offering no symptoms.
4. Some undetected STDs cause irreparable damage to the body. Depending on the STD, damage may take place to the reproduction system causing sterility, to the eyes causing blindness, etc.
5. HPV is a genital human papillomavirus and is the most common sexually transmitted infection (STI). There are more than 40 HPV types that can infect the genital areas of males and females.
6. Almost all cases of cervical dysplasia or cervical cancer* are caused by human papilloma virus (HPV).
7. An unplanned pregnancy is a planned pregnancy resulting from using no birth control.
8. Condoms are not 100% effective to prevent an STD or a pregnancy.
9. Committed sexual relationships among single partners are a string of promiscuous sexual relationships over time..including that partner and all the partners that they have had and all the partners that the partners have had and so on.  Infidelity in a marriage contributes to this string.
10. Abstinence is the most effective to prevent the transmission of a sexually transmitted disease or sexually transmitted infection.

HPV Source Information Source for this Post: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

Cervical Dysplasia and Cervical Cancer Source Information for this Post: PubMed Health/National Center for Biotechnology Information

STD - General Information Source for this Post: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

*Additional Reading:  BlackDoctor.org - Six Ways to Reduce Your Risk of Cervical Cancer:  http://blackdoctor.org/14965/how-to-prevent-cervical-cancer/

Repost from April 2011 

www.ladyintelligence.com

Nicol

*Amendment

Human Error....Ouch

Imagine depositing a little over $1,500 in a checking account every month for two years.  That comes up to about $40,000.  Only thing is that it's not your checking account...but you intended it to be.

That's what happened to a woman transferring money to what she believed to her joint bank account according to a recent post from shine.yahoo.com.

When completing any type of form - whether online or the old fashioned way at the teller, be sure to have the account number right first before filling it out on a form.  Then check through each digit three times.  Backwards and forward.

Twenty times is worth $40,000.  Two hundred times.

That recipient must have been leaping for joy.


Read the entire story:
http://shine.yahoo.com/work-money/a-typo-cost-this-woman-a-fortune-211812415.html?.tsrc=opera

Consumer Consciouness About Private Information

There is no 100% surefire way to avoid private information from getting into the wrong hands in today's ever evolving technological world…just ways to minimize the exposure such as:

Using a PO Box

Use a PO Box address for mail instead of the residential mailbox.  The mail will be delivered inside the post office and accessible by only the US Postal personnel and the PO Box owner.  Using a PO Box helps to keep a residential address private.  Although if there is any kind of public record involving the resident i.e. mortgage, property tax records, any type of court case - the residential address becomes public as well unless the PO Box is the only address provided for contact.  Even if that is the case, the court transcripts may still reveal the residential address.

Using a Shredder

The only thing about a shredder though is that if somebody really wants to get a hold of something, they can reconstruct the document if they have time on their hands.    There was a time once where I shredded a document.  If I didn't find that document later in little strips neatly put back together, with my SSN on it, on somebody else’s desk.  (Yep) This goes to show that if there isn't much in the shredder or if the shredded document is of a distinct color, the document might as well had been crumpled up and thrown in an open trash can. Discard personal or private information inside the home and/or outside of the workplace.  Never throw away personal or private information including mail in any public trash receptacle – even when picking up junk mail from the PO Box at the post office.  Tear up in small pieces of paper with attention to areas that include personal information such as the address, phone number, date of birth, name, SSN, account information and Driver’s License number.

Social Media

In "Big Girl Little Girl Everything I CanThink Of Right Now To Tell You About Life, Money, Credit, Boys, Men andSex," there is a chapter specific about Social Media as well as other online activities such as Internet Dating.  A few tips:

• Never post online where you are at the time that you are there.  This let's people know that you are not home.  Everybody added as a "friend" is not really a friend and those "friends" have friends that you haven't paid any attention to - yet one or two may pay a great deal of attention to you.  Recap on your events of the day ONCE you have returned home. With that being said, be mindful of what you say about being home alone and enjoying the house to yourself.
• Never post something that will give an indication of your work, school, or recreation schedule.  Again another way someone can keep track of your comings and goings.
• Limit photo posting.  Post pictures of places you've visited after you come back.  If photos are posted of you or family, limit the views to those who are closest like best friends, close family, and the like.  Once a photo is posted, it can easily be downloaded to and shared with anyone's computer by the simple right-click, copy/save-as, attach, then e-mail.
• Social Media is geared for everyone to be social about what they like and what they do.  It's really nobody's business where you currently work.  When current workplace info is posted online, people you know nothing about know a little something more about you.
• Never post anything about children’s activities unless the settings are just for very close friends and family members – not that that means anything either.  Couldn’t quickly put hands on stats but it's probably safe to assume that over 50% of crimes committed against children are from close friends and family members.

Regular U.S. Mail Drop Off

Never leave mail in the open mailbox for the US Postal Carrier to pick-up.  Take any articles that need mailing directly to a US Postal Mailbox or call the US Postal Service about services that provide pick up of U.S. Mail that need to be sent.

Paying By Check

Routing and checking account numbers are just as good as cash in hand - especially with online payment centers that use this information.  With today's technology a check can be printed and presented for payment at any time and there are still some institutions that cheerfully cash third party checks with no questions asked.   To be better safe than sorry, do not use public WiFi to make any payments online no matter what security settings are placed on your computer or whatever security statement is noted or available on the public WiFi.  When throwing away deposit slips after using up all of the checks in a pad, tear up the routing and account information on the deposit slips before placing in the home garbage.

Paying by Debit/Credit Card

Just like checks, debit cards, even used as credit cards, are gateways to the vault of somebody’s money.  Online debit/credit card use is most likely better used for just utility, mortgage, and car note payments.  If purchasing something online, be sure the site and/or the information that is being sent and received is encrypted.  Again, do not use public WiFi to make any payments online no matter what security settings are placed on your computer or whatever security statement is noted or available on the public WiFi.

Note:  It is very important to review your accounts no less than every other day.  If theft has occurred, some lending institutions give a small window to bring it to their attention that your account has been compromised.  If the bank is not contacted within that time parameter, there may be little recourse to get the bank account reimbursed for the loss that was stolen minus the fee or money hold that banks will impose in case of theft.  Terms and agreements are not written and distributed just to kill trees.  It's important to read every document received from the beginning to end with all terms and agreements for all financial accounts to know the proper procedures in case of theft as well as fee amounts for certain situations.

For more information visit:  

http://www.consumer.ftc.gov/features/feature-0014-identity-theft

Additional consumer related information, visit:  http://www.consumer.ftc.gov/

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