1. She Does All The Planning
When a woman does all the planning of what she and "her man" are going to do for the day, the week, the evening, the weekend, their future, and their life, she is the captain (so she thinks) and the lone crewman in that relationship. Simply, the guy is just on the boat to enjoy the cruise.
2. She Doesn't Make a Move Until She Knows What He Is Doing
If a woman has to first check to see what a man
might do before she can decide what time she will go to the store or create her five year plan regarding her education, career, and finances, she has enslaved herself. When a woman plans her life on a man's availability, she does not have a life because she has given it over to him.
3. She Tosses Everything Aside to Devote Her Time and Energy With Him
A woman who tosses aside her friends, family, children, and other responsibilities is literally a woman who got her nose (and most likely her legs) wide open. A woman's priority must be her health, her home's stability, and taking care of her family and/or other matters in her household. When a woman gives it
all up for a man for the sake of the relationship, ultimately she will have
nothing when the man decides to be with a woman who he had to work for to get or when he just gets tired of being smothered.
4. She Opens The Door
Chivalry is not dead and a man being a gentleman is not outdated. A woman must always consider herself a lady and demand to be treated as such.
- If the guy gets into the driver's seat while the woman opens up the door for herself to get in;
- If he walks behind her and waits for her to open the door to the restaurant or if he walks in before her;
- If he orders his meal first instead of allowing the woman to first tell the server what she would like to have;
- If he takes the best seat at the booth (unless he needs to keep his eye on the door);
- If he responds to every text message and phone call while on a date;
- If he does all the talking about himself
- If she puts her coat on and he doesn't assist
...then...as some folk say it... He ain't studden (studying) her.
He is either all about himself, testing her to see just what she demands or what she would put up with, or he has never learned etiquette and/or how to be a gentleman.
5. Come Hell or High Water, She Is There
If a woman places herself in danger by traveling to his home in inclement weather; if she calls off from work or leaves her children with someone all the time to kick it at his home; if she ignores family events to sit on his couch or lay in his bed; if she takes care of things for him financially, then the guy got himself a fool for love and a fool over him. The question comes down to...Is it love or is it obsession?
6. Come Hell or High Water, He is Not There
Anytime a woman is not confident that the man with whom she is emotionally, financially, and intimately involved will not be there for her, then most likely she is not who he considers to be his woman. Of course, women should be able to do things for themselves like change a tire, make a household repair, or put together a bicycle or furniture that came in the box. But if a woman has a man that she does A LOT for, it is not unreasonable to expect that man to come when she is a damsel in distress. If a woman calls that man who is sitting at home with a way to get to her when she is stranded and comes up with a weak excuse on why he cannot come, she has given EVERYTHING to the wrong man.
These simple signs of irrational behavior are signals of severely low self-esteem. Not only are they signs that the woman has cemented herself in an unhealthy relationship, but there is indication that she has some unhealthy mental and social behaviors and perceptions.
A healthy relationship consists of two people putting into the relationship on an equal balance. But, a relationship is not a tit-for-tat record keeping program. It's just about giving and receiving naturally. A healthy relationship is not when he gives her just enough of token gifts to make her think he is into her either.
Some women believe that they must do all they can to "save" a relationship or to put in the work so that the relationship will endure the rough times. Then, some women believe that anything is better than saying she does not have someone in her life. Although, both of these perceptions are unhealthy, the latter is definitely detrimental to a woman's time, body, mind, and soul.
My mother, widowed after happily married 53 years to my father after their several year courtship, used to tell me, "Don't you do all the loving."
When a woman does
all the loving, it's safe to say she is typically loving by herself.
tnd
Share with the women you care about - especially the ones in an unhealthy relationship and the younger females starting out.
